Maid of Honor Toast Guidelines

Write a speech ahead of time and practice before friends or family

By Julie Hampton

Photo by Jaime Windon

One of the maid of honor's many responsibilities is to give a toast during the reception dinner party. The speech is traditionally given about the middle of the party, before people begin to leave. Though some toasts are spontaneous, it is best to prepare a well-written speech. The toast usually lasts anywhere from 30 seconds to a minute or two. Use note cards to trigger your memory while giving the speech if you think you'll be getting nervous.

• What You Need to Know
• Aside from a wine or champagne glass for the toast, the second most helpful item to any maid of honor speech is note cards. They can organize your thoughts in a manageable fashion and can often be so discreet that you can use them during the toast.

Step 1:

Write an initial draft of the toast three weeks ahead of time. Develop the speech and have a friend or family member edit it. Practice the speech in front of a mirror or small audience so you are comfortable with the words and flow of the toast.

Step 2:

Include a thank you to the bride and groom as an opening line. Thank them for allowing you to participate in their wedding ceremony as the maid of honor. Tell a short story or anecdote about your relationship with the bride. The story can be humorous or serious. Don't tell anything embarrassing about the bride; leave out wild spring break stories or any references to ex-boyfriends.

Step 3:

Add a literary quote, song lyric or inspirational saying to the toast. Choose quotes from a beloved book you and the bride share, or a favorite movie that you have both watched. Look through song lyrics from a favorite band for encouragement. Read classic poetry such as Shakespeare for words about love. You can also give words of advice that relate to the chosen quote.

Step 4:

Remember to not rush the speech. Speak clearly and loudly. Enjoy one glass of wine before the toast to help relax, but no more.

Step 5:

Wish the couple well on their road to marital bliss. End the toast with a raising of the glass. Hold the glass in your right hand and congratulate the couple by name, such as, "To Wendy and Todd." Take a small sip from your glass after the toast.

• Tips & Warnings
• If you don't drink alcohol, it is okay to fill the glass with water or another nonalcoholic beverage such as sparkling cider.
• If you do drink alcohol, be sure not to over-imbibe before (or for that matter after) giving your toast.
• Practice your toast multiple times in the days leading up to the wedding. This will allow you to become comfortable with your speech and familiar with key phrases. Don't worry if you don't deliver it exactly word for word.
• Above all, be sincere and heartfelt.